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GARY, IN—Asserting that the jurist had proven clear moral lapses in accepting lavish items and globe-trotting journeys from Republican megadonor Harlan Crow, the Supreme Court docket reportedly dispatched Justice Clarence Thomas on a disciplinary journey to Gary, IN Friday. “The affiliate justice displayed evident poor judgment in not disclosing his quite a few journeys to Indonesia and Bohemian Grove, and can now obtain an all-expenses-paid punitive journey to Gary,” learn an announcement launched by the Supreme Court docket, stressing that throughout the weekend getaway to the Rust Belt metropolis, Thomas would make amends for his actions by ingesting a glass of Gary’s faucet water and visiting the historic downtown’s Aquatorium. “Justice Thomas and his spouse Ginny will share a room at a rundown Motel 6 and dine at an all-you-can-eat buffet referred to as Chinese language Wall. As well as, Justice Thomas will hopefully get an opportunity to mirror on the harm he’s completed to the Supreme Court docket’s status whereas he’s sitting within the saddest strip membership within the nation. He won’t be allowed to go to Michael Jackson’s household dwelling. Might this function a warning to all future Supreme Court docket justices.” At press time, sources confirmed Justice Thomas had died of an obvious fentanyl overdose.
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